What to Ask Your Doctor After a Miscarriage 

Do you ever find yourself overwhelmed when it comes to questions to ask of you doctor and other medical professionals after going through a pregnancy loss?  Doctors visits can be intimidating and if you are dealing with a miscarriage, emotions are often at an all-time high, making it even more difficult to ask intentional, well-formed questions.  Here are my top tips for making the most of your appointment and most importantly, becoming your own best advocate on your fertility journey! 

When it comes to what to ask, well, really, anything you want! Remember, your doctor is there to help you and when it comes to questions, they have heard it all.  I find most people have an idea of what to ask, but struggle with actually asking the questions once in the doctor’s office. Either they forget what they wanted to ask, they feel rushed or start to feel the question is silly (but really, there are NO silly questions).  

Become Knowledgable on Testing

It is easy to become overwhelmed when it comes to blood work and other testing.  It can be daunting! I have created a checklist of testing to explore after going through a miscarriage.  I recommend printing this checklist and taking it with you to an appointment.  See where you might have gaps in testing. If you have not done a test, talk about with your doctor to see if you can do this test and if not, work to understand why this particular test is not recommended for you.

Click here to get my free Miscarriage Lab Checklist, when you sign up for our weekly newsletter.

How to Advocate for Yourself After a Miscarriage 

Here are my suggestions for how to advocate for yourself at your next doctors. A step-by-step on figuring out how to make sure you actually ask them once it comes time for your appointment! 

1. Make a LIST

Start recording all of your questions in advance (WELL in advance so you can capture all those randoms questions that pop up in the days leading up to your appointment!)
*NUMBER that list*.  

2. Take a PHYSICAL List to Appointment

At your appointment, bring in your physical, numbered list (print it out if it is typed!).  Let your doctor know you have questions and TELL THEM THE NUMBER (this is key, this keeps you accountable for asking ALL of your questions and not feeling rushed or chickening out on some of your questions). 
Ask the questions (all of them!).  If you have already said you have 10 questions, it is less likely you will get cut off or back off from asking all of you questions. 

3. Re-Evaluate Your Doctor

Not satisfied with the doctor? Re-evaluate fit and seek additional/ alternative care if needed.

Note that you can swap “doctor” for any medical professional you are working with- naturopath, acupuncturist, dietitian, etc.  You do need to keep the questions within the scope of that person’s care.  For example, your obgyn is most likely going to refer to a specialist to answer some of your questions and that is ok, but if you are already working with a specialist, for example at a fertility clinic or an MFM (maternal fetal medicine doctor) then they should be able to answer the tough questions.

Want More?

Listen to my podcast episode on this topic, linked here.

Advocating for yourself is also something I cover in an entire section of the Moving Forward program. I even provide a lab tracker so that you can take ownership over your labwork and have it all in one place.  If you are interested in joining that program, go here. I personally designed this program so that it has the potential to make a HUGE impact in your path forward, starting today, so no matter where you are on your journey or how many losses you have had, you will be able to find valuable content as you move forward.

Miscarriage is hard. You deserve to be heard and have your questions answered.